[I was going to do this as a video, but it's just too long :-[
Hi I'm Kenny Zook. Now, this may seem kinda late in the season to be starting a
football site, but when I decided to do this last summer, I incorporated and ever
since I've either been talking to lawyers, talking to accountants, or trying to
process the phenomenal amount of info those cats can throw at ya!
So, I'm not a professional, but I play one here on the internet. I'm the CXO at
Hat Boss Dot Com, LLC. Of course, outside of football, Hat Boss is all about pretty
pictures, so sometimes I just llike to pronounce LLC, Lloock. The 'X' in CXO, of
course is a variable, insert any letter. Who do you want to talk to? The CFO? Well,
I wish that was my accountant, but he has his own business and he tells me that's
not how this works. And I trust him, because *he's* a professional. So *I'm* the
CFO. Please see my accountant.
Anyway, I want to explain my multi-tier fan structure with the NFL. Tier one is
the NFL. Anybody good enough to play football in the NFL, I'm a fan of yours! Naturally,
I like some players and teams better than others, and may or may not be happy with
any particular favorites at any particular time, hence the other tiers.
The only two NFL cities I've ever lived in were Cincinnati and Chicago, I grew up
in over a dozen towns (all East of the Mississippi River), and travelled the world
for 15 years after high school. There's not a team in the NFL I haven't really liked
at some point or another, nor a team that hasn't hacked me off more than once, some
more than others, of course.
So, I'll never be unbiased, but my liking any team today is no promise that I'll
still like them next week, month, or year. Yes, I am a Bears fan, and they're high
on the list of teams that are hacking me off lately. The Bengals I still haven't
forgiven for their first championship loss to the Niners (nor the "new" helmets,
for that matter). I have fond memories of Cincinnati, but, Most Bungles, I mean
Bengals fans prob'ly aren't real happy with that team now either. I always strive
to be fair in my analysis, so the Bengals lead the list of teams I need a guest
commentator for.
Beyond my "I just like good football" approach to analysis, I do have a handful
of outrageously successful prognostications on my resume. The greatest of those
is not about football, by the way, my greatest prediction ever was of my son's gender,
without benefit of ultrasound. "No," sez I, "He'll be a boy by royal decree! I had
the girl valve shut off!" I'd really like to put the boy through college someday,
if only to thank him properly for letting me off the hook on that one, ya know?
My earliest great NFL call was when Joe Montana played his first NFL game. I was
no fan of the Niners at the time, and didn't follow college ball, so I had never
heard the man's name in my life before the announcer said he was going into the
game. I was in the back of the room not watching, but it caught my ear, and I said,
"Joe Montana? That dude's going to the hall of fame! That's the best quarterback
name I ever heard!"
Then there's my prediction after the Patriots second championship loss that they'd
be a pretty good team someday if they'd get that sissy lookin' logo off their helmets,
and a shop full of U.S. Marines and civil servants I cleaned out when the Steelers
beat the Cowboys in the championship.
Now I can't promise I'll do any of that kinda crystal ball trash talk quality here,
but I can't promise I won't, either. I still have my moments, though. I picked the
Pats and Colts to falter with O line problems before this season started, and last
year was on the Randy Moss/Patriots bandwagon the moment the trade was announced,
and I don't even like the Pats! (I'm kinda burned out on the dynasty I predicted,
and therefore helped create in a fractal sort of way). And I'm proud to say
that I am among the least surprised anywhere by what Bill Parcels has done with
Miami. I put them down for a radical improvement on Parcels' first day.
I CAN promise that I'll call some wrong, though. That goes back to the Vikes first
two modern era championship losses. (After the first one I at least made money off
of 'em to ease my pain, I was a big vikes fan back then.) But we're all wrong sometimes.
I just missed a big one, in fact. I picked the Colts and Not the Pats to pull out
of their stalls near the finish, and I say hats off to Big Bill Belichick for getting
that Pats offense turned around.
I originally wanted to do this show, because Sometimes the vast bulk of the press
I hear is wrong, or at least misguided; my outlet for the times when I say, "YO!
Am I the only one who gets it?"
But, that doesn't happen ALL the time, and this season, as surprising as a lot of
the action has been, coverage has been above par, in my opinion. I hear at
least one journalist on the right track most every time the majority is just wrong.
My only real gripe this year is one I've been big on for several years now, and
that is how good a great O-line can make a mediocre QB, and how bad a faltering
O-line can make the greatest superstars.
So, my show will be a weekly series of 32 shows as a tier one fan of each team in
the NFL. They won't be as long as this one [would be if I posted a video this big],
and some will be way short if'n I don't get some comments from fans. I'm just one
guy and I still have a day job, so I can only process so many stats.
If enough people buy my specialty hats through my affiliate links, of course, and
maybe patronize my art sites, I'll have more time to study the game, and the percentage
paid for guest commentators could get to be, like, more than a candy bar or two.
So, send your commentary, preferably on points you think the big media has missed,
to
contest@hatboss.com.
Thanks.
|